Broken Vows....

I begged him again on friday when he dropped off the kids...he told me once again "that he cared for me, but just wasn't IN love with me anymore." What a hard pill to swallow. This february would've been our 6 year mark. 6 years with same person. All i've known for over half a decade is him. He's only been gone for 39 days, yet already he acts as if he never knew me. Maybe he didn't, maybe I didn't. I'm sad, and at a loss for words. I always thought things could be worked out as long as it was only outer madness that was involved, but unfortuantely he's taken it to matters of the heart. He has basically taken my heart that i vowed only to him, and turned it into his own personal ball of clay. No man deserves that power. He cheated....yeah i said it. I promised to keep it real, raw and there's nothing more transparent than this. Who cares if it's sex or only a thought. Infidelity is all the same. He broke his vow. He says, to him, we're already divorced....but we're not. He has strange women calling and sharing inimate moments with him, MY HUSBAND...and it's not me. It's all so bizarre. Here i stand lost, cold and once again alone. Lord help my strength flourish. Help me not to question where i went wrong, or why i wasn't enough. Help me to forgive....!