Missed you....

Hello guys...I haven't updated in a while. Things are okay...i'm still breathing. The crying so much has slowed down to a slow leak...but i'm healing. I'm still a little confused about this whole situation, but for the most part, day to day things just get a little clearer. You can't make someone love you anymore than you can drink the entire ocean through a straw. I really feel in my heart i have one of two options. Do I wait around and hope one day the man that i married will turn his eyes away from this world and all of it's offerings back to me, or do i just let it all go. With one long deep breath just sigh it all out and let it evaporate into the air. I think that's what I'll do. Someday, somehow i will be happy again....and love again...i have to, because that's who i am. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers during such a tough time in my life. I need them and appreciate them sincerely. Talk to you soon.
ps.
I'm working on a new song(one that's currently written on a napkin ontop of my rather small plastic keyboard :) tell me what you think of this small portion...

Here I am Lord
Lost and broken in this world
Can you hear my Cries
Of shouts and praises
Glory to the Lamb on high
My Adonai

Here we stand Lord
We won't be moved
lift up the battle cry
Raise your voices
Glory to the Lamb on high
My El Shaddai ... (still a work in progress)